Ignore the critics and thrive
2015-10-07 16:47
icon with a microphone Felicia Mabuza-Suttle today lives in America, where she hosts a talk show on The Africa Channel and runs an executive leadership training and business communications company, Leadership Success International, while holding sh
Live Your Dream by Felicia Mabuza-Suttle
Victory International Publishers
220 pages
R225
When you are doing what you know and believe is right, you can withstand a tornado of criticism. Ignore the critics who just stand on the sidelines, finding fault, doing nothing that makes any real and constructive change in the world.
I tried to create change in South Africa with a microphone. My colleagues and I got South Africa talking through The Felicia Show. Many South Africans still tell me they miss the show, which allowed “ordinary” people to share their views in the new democratic climate of the time.
Many supporters of my show said: “You are ahead of your time. Your good work will be understood later.” These words have been proven true.
Some of our harshest critics now tell me how effective the show was and how urgently it is needed in South Africa today due to the numerous allegations of corruption, crime and related social injustices. The Felicia Show could have tapped into this new political discourse.
The show challenged the status quo in South Africa, especially the legacy of past injustices in the lives of individuals. For the first time, blacks and whites were openly debating and challenging each other on television. Some of the debates were quite heated as highly contentious issues were raised.
Some debates dealt with race relations. A number of whites had not accepted reality and remained unwilling to give up or share power. Other topics focused on young people who questioned traditional customs such as lobola ... or the practice of polygamy.
I recall walking through the airport one day when a white man shouted, “Go back home, Yankee!” His outburst referred to the fact that I had lived in America for many years, yet I returned to South Africa to encourage open debate about issues that seemed to frighten some people.
The man’s demeanour seemed to say: “How dare you!” especially since during apartheid, blacks were forced to be subservient and expected to pander to the baas, “the master’s voice”.
I often listened to radio talk shows and it amused me that so many white South African women were baffled by this “assertive American woman dressed in Escada outfits”. It was 1994, and most of those women were only accustomed to dealing with black women in the roles of maids or nannies.
I was a complete enigma to them.
I often felt I was not winning either way – with whites, or sometimes, even blacks. Most black men criticised me for allowing debates that questioned the widely practised African traditions of lobola and polygamy, and patriarchal customs that held women back, professionally and personally.
But it was not my role to influence opinion on those topics. I simply provided a platform for people to voice their own opinions. Because of my years abroad, my critics saw me as an instigator and someone who was out of touch with the realities of African customs.
Since we were all subjected to the same prejudices, I was convinced my support would come from black women. However, that proved to be untrue, particularly for one sector of South African women. The criticism from mostly black professional women was the harshest. I would hear them spew their hurtful, venomous words on radio talk shows.
But as one professional woman admitted during an interview: “Most are just envious and jealous that they were not able to do what you did,” adding “They’re jealous, jealous, jealous.”
My biggest support came from the youth who voted me a “most admired role model” in many surveys. I still get a large number of emails from young people. A sampling of some of those emails are included at the back of this book.
That support was heartwarming because it was a sure sign of a promising future for our country, with potential leaders who were willing to allow for free and open debate on topics most important to South Africans.
Free and open debate will make South Africa strong and will keep the old, oppressive ways of apartheid at bay.
The more people challenge you, criticise you or condemn you, the more you are on the right track.
Stay focused, keep your eyes on your mission. You are here on earth for a purpose. Fulfil your reason for being. Allow criticism to energise you to action and propel you to even greater heights
Ignore the critics and thrive
2015-10-07 16:47
icon with a microphone Felicia Mabuza-Suttle today lives in America, where she hosts a talk show on The Africa Channel and runs an executive leadership training and business communications company, Leadership Success International, while holding sh
Live Your Dream by Felicia Mabuza-Suttle
Victory International Publishers
220 pages
R225
When you are doing what you know and believe is right, you can withstand a tornado of criticism. Ignore the critics who just stand on the sidelines, finding fault, doing nothing that makes any real and constructive change in the world.
I tried to create change in South Africa with a microphone. My colleagues and I got South Africa talking through The Felicia Show. Many South Africans still tell me they miss the show, which allowed “ordinary” people to share their views in the new democratic climate of the time.
Many supporters of my show said: “You are ahead of your time. Your good work will be understood later.” These words have been proven true.
Some of our harshest critics now tell me how effective the show was and how urgently it is needed in South Africa today due to the numerous allegations of corruption, crime and related social injustices. The Felicia Show could have tapped into this new political discourse.
The show challenged the status quo in South Africa, especially the legacy of past injustices in the lives of individuals. For the first time, blacks and whites were openly debating and challenging each other on television. Some of the debates were quite heated as highly contentious issues were raised.
Some debates dealt with race relations. A number of whites had not accepted reality and remained unwilling to give up or share power. Other topics focused on young people who questioned traditional customs such as lobola ... or the practice of polygamy.
I recall walking through the airport one day when a white man shouted, “Go back home, Yankee!” His outburst referred to the fact that I had lived in America for many years, yet I returned to South Africa to encourage open debate about issues that seemed to frighten some people.
The man’s demeanour seemed to say: “How dare you!” especially since during apartheid, blacks were forced to be subservient and expected to pander to the baas, “the master’s voice”.
I often listened to radio talk shows and it amused me that so many white South African women were baffled by this “assertive American woman dressed in Escada outfits”. It was 1994, and most of those women were only accustomed to dealing with black women in the roles of maids or nannies.
I was a complete enigma to them.
I often felt I was not winning either way – with whites, or sometimes, even blacks. Most black men criticised me for allowing debates that questioned the widely practised African traditions of lobola and polygamy, and patriarchal customs that held women back, professionally and personally.
But it was not my role to influence opinion on those topics. I simply provided a platform for people to voice their own opinions. Because of my years abroad, my critics saw me as an instigator and someone who was out of touch with the realities of African customs.
Since we were all subjected to the same prejudices, I was convinced my support would come from black women. However, that proved to be untrue, particularly for one sector of South African women. The criticism from mostly black professional women was the harshest. I would hear them spew their hurtful, venomous words on radio talk shows.
But as one professional woman admitted during an interview: “Most are just envious and jealous that they were not able to do what you did,” adding “They’re jealous, jealous, jealous.”
My biggest support came from the youth who voted me a “most admired role model” in many surveys. I still get a large number of emails from young people. A sampling of some of those emails are included at the back of this book.
That support was heartwarming because it was a sure sign of a promising future for our country, with potential leaders who were willing to allow for free and open debate on topics most important to South Africans.
Free and open debate will make South Africa strong and will keep the old, oppressive ways of apartheid at bay.
The more people challenge you, criticise you or condemn you, the more you are on the right track.
Stay focused, keep your eyes on your mission. You are here on earth for a purpose. Fulfil your reason for being. Allow criticism to energise you to action and propel you to even greater heights
